The Girl in Black

Se necesita una poca de gracia.

Tuesday, March 15, 2005

So Long and Thanks for all the Sex...

My ex is leaving for good on Thursday. Right about now he should be looking for the packing tape so he can get together his belongings in boxes. He won't be taking much, but he is taking the booze, so I'll have to find an alternate form of payment for those who help me move later this month. But that doesn't really bother me.

I think I'll miss having him around actually. Despite the lack of privacy, it's nice to have another human being in my apartment. (I often had roommates when I lived "alone" before.) I suppose we would have made terrific roommates if it weren't for all of the emotional baggage.

I was thinking on it this morning, how we were both finding that there are good things about living in Orlando. We both have cool friends, and there are fun things to do that we never did when we were together for some reason. (Goddess knows what posessed the two of us to think we had to do things together all of the time.) We were talking about how it's tempting to want to stay here, and my ex said that I should still get out and move to San Francisco like I was wanting to.

Then he had to spoil the friendly moment by teasing me, saying that it's where all of the flighty, freaky people are, so it's where I belong. (He didn't use the exact terminology, but that's the gist of it.) His tone was rather snide, but I ignored it. Or joked along, or whatever. I just went along with it. It didn't register with me until now how much that kind of statement really stings. He claims that he always accepted me for who I was, and still does, and yet he teased and continues teasing me in a rather disapproving tone about what he percieves to be my faults.

Why would I want to put up with that? Did I do that to him? I'm sure I did at times, and I am sorry for it, because claiming love, acceptance, and tolerance only to undercut your partner with snide comments thinly veiled as teasing jokes is not a healthy exercise in a long term relationship.

So, lessons have been learned, and moving on is happening. At least the sex was pretty darn good for the most part. (The snuggles were pretty awesome too.) I suppose I'll be hearing about all of this if he's there when I get home...

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